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The Charisma Gap Between Drunk & Sober You

The Charisma Gap Between Drunk & Sober You

Like most guys I found that girls generally reacted better to me after I drank a few beers. So when I started going out and seriously trying to improve my ability to talk to girls, I had one major question..

Could I ever be as outgoing, confident and funny sober as I was after a few beers?

I was unsure of the answer and it bothered me, but there was only one way to know for sure. I went out five nights a week, for 18 months straight, and talked to thousands of women. 95% of the time I was dead sober. It didn’t take me all that long to figure out an answer to my question: after six months I could confidently say that I was just as good dead sober as I was after three beers. In fact, in many ways I was better. While drinking is an awesome social lubricant and a brilliant way to fast-track the interaction to the bedroom, it has a few drawbacks.

  • If you get too sloppy girls tend to blow you off. Most (not all) girls are not that interested in going home with a guy who his slurring his words and tripping over himself. Sometimes it doesn’t even have to be that extreme. If she senses you’ve had a few beers and you’re buzzing from that, she’s not interested.
  • Walking up to a girl at the bar, creating a bond, dealing with logistics and leading her to the bedroom is not always simple. There’s a lot that can go wrong. If you’re drinking there’s a higher chance that you make a stupid mistake.
  • There’s the boring truth that drinking is bad for you and it’s expensive. A beer in New York is $8. If you go out a lot those expenses add up.

So here it is. Based on my experience, starting from a point where I was so nervous my knees were shaking, I guarantee you that you can unlock your charismatic side without a drop of alcohol. It will take a while, you’re going to go through some bullshit and there will be some shitty nights. However, you can do it and it doesn’t take that long (in the grand scheme). So get out there, start talking to girls and make something happen!